Park Hyatt Tokyo

The Park Hyatt Tokyo, or that place Bill Murray chased around a whore for an hour and a half.

They looked at us a little funny when we checked in for just a night but we figured it was our last night in Tokyo, so why the hell not.

Staying at the Park Hyatt is certainly an experience. First you have to take an elevator up 40-something floors just to get to the lobby. You walk through the bar, past reception, then take another elevator up to get to your room.

Once you’re there, it certainly feels like you took two elevators to get there. You’re high enough that you can see the very curvature of the earth, but I’m not sure how I felt about it. There comes a point where you’re so high up that everything just looks like ants. Are we in the Park Hyatt in Tokyo or are flying over downtown Oklahoma? As far as I’m concerned, while the view was unique, we had better (i.e. more iconic) views from every other hotel we’d stayed in.

Park Hyatt View @ Shinjuku, Tokyo, Japan
A note on the window helpfully reminded us to shut the blinds at night because the window washers do their thing early in the morning. That was a first.

Supposedly the bar is a tourist destination in and of itself because of that stupid movie and the price of drinks reflects this, but we were informed that you can run across some pretty big celebrities at the bar. We heard rumors that Lady Gaga was in town and staying at the Park Hyatt. The bar looked nice and certainly offered an amazing view of Tokyo but we had better things to do than stalking celebrities, like spending the evening vomiting buffet pizza and convenience-store beer into the toilet. At least my wife got to enjoy the jacuzzi.

Park Hyatt Bathroom @ Shinjuku, Tokyo, Japan
We loved the color scheme of our room. Everything was a soft sandstone, green, white and black. I hear that Hitler’s emergency bunkers all had similar green interiors for their calming and anti-suicidal properties (as well as no bathroom doors– privacy gives one an opportunity to off themselves discreetly). Last days of the war and all that. We did have bathroom doors and I don’t think the windows opened but can’t help thinking there might be something to this color psychology thing:

Currently the most popular decorating color, green symbolizes nature. It is the easiest color on the eye and can improve vision. It is a calming, refreshing color. People waiting to appear on TV sit in “green rooms” to relax. Hospitals often use green because it relaxes patients. Brides in the Middle Ages wore green to symbolize fertility. Dark green is masculine, conservative, and implies wealth. However, seamstresses often refuse to use green thread on the eve of a fashion show for fear it will bring bad luck.

Once we got home we tried to replicate it but didn’t quite make it so we settled on a more traditional red, black and white instead. What does red do for us?

The most emotionally intense color, red stimulates a faster heartbeat and breathing. It is also the color of love. Red clothing gets noticed and makes the wearer appear heavier. Since it is an extreme color, red clothing might not help people in negotiations or confrontations. Red cars are popular targets for thieves. In decorating, red is usually used as an accent. Decorators say that red furniture should be perfect since it will attract attention.


At any rate, the bedding was comfortable as all hell, and the room offered all the same features we’d come to expect of Japanese hotels. Bedside lighting and window controls, etc. The bidet worked as expected provided you press the right button. Mini-fridge stocked with liquors, beer and water, and I don’t know. If you’re paying $600 a night to stay somewhere you should already have some expectations of what you get for it.

It’s sad to think this was our last stop here.

The next morning, since we didn’t know any better, we reserved seats on the Narita shuttle bus that departed from the Park Hyatt. Of course we were running late, and the gracious Japanese bus driver accommodated us anyway, but in the future we will take the train instead.

PROTIP: Don’t take the shuttle bus if you have an active Japan Rail Pass. If you can get to JR Tokyo station, the pass will get you onto the express train for free, and you’ll get to Narita a hell of a lot faster.

Oh well, until next time…


Pro-family and anti-drug, when he's not too busy living with four beautiful ladies, he likes long walks on the beach and poking dead things with sticks.

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